For those not familiar with VIP hosting/club promoting, it’s where clubs pay someone to bring attractive girls in to party for the night with the hope that their presence will entice men to buy bottle service and tables (which can form around 80% of a club’s take on any given night). To incentivize girls to come, clubs provide promoters with their own tables and bottles for the girls, all of which are comped by the club. Some clubs also provide complimentary, promoter-hosted dinners for the girls before in advance of the night out.
I have been a VIP host since late January of this year, when I randomly approached a promoter on the street in Miami and explained my background to him, after which he started me on his team that same night. I promoted for a couple weeks, took a month off due to leaving Miami, then continued when I moved to New York City in late March.
I’m writing this up because I realized I never explained to a lot of wings/readers why my focus (and thus the focus of my field reports and writings) has suddenly shifted from “master cold approach” to “master club promoting/VIP hosting as a subset of social circle game”. Hell, I’ve never even sat down and vocalized the reasons myself. So here is my attempt:
Becoming Comfortable Breaking Boundaries
Discomfort with breaking boundaries has been a major sticking point throughout my career in Game and life in general. I am a very compartmentalized person: life is here, Game is over there, and nary the two shall meet.
For example, I’ve only slept with one friend ever, and I’ve only slept with a few friends of friends. 95% of my lays are from complete strangers where my intent to sleep with them was more or less clear from the moment we met.
Whenever I enter a situation with boundaries, I notice that I play it safe to an extreme. If someone challenged me to try to hook up with a girl I work with, or a girl in one of my social circles, I would be extremely uncomfortable about this prospect. My natural inclination is to be overly friendly and even “fake beta” with any girl where this would be a possibility, just to make sure I disqualify sex and don’t cross any lines or create drama.
Promoting offers me a way to baby step this skill in a situation where boundaries are more loosely defined and the repercussions for crossing them are not that high — in fact, transgressions are almost expected, as the modus operandi of any given promoter is that he will try to sleep with the girls he brings out.
It’s funny, though, even with the very loose boundaries that exist within the months I’ve spent promoting so far, I still notice myself holding back to an almost excessive amount, making excuses not to flirt with girls at my table: “But what if it backfires? What if Iose her as a lead? What if she rejects me, won’t it be awkward?”
This shows how deeply ingrained boundaries are within me, and I’m excited to continue confronting these fears within the safe space of promoting.
Leveraging My Existing Skillset
I am one of the most social and charismatic people I’ve ever met. I am able to build rapport with new people extremely quickly and enrapture them with conversation to make them excited about continued interaction with me.
In addition, I am a born salesman and have worked in some form of sales for most of my professional career.
Promoting combines these skills. Similar to being a real estate agent, it is true “social sales”: instead of mostly selling a product, you’re mostly selling yourself, with the tertiary products being the club itself as well as the experience of the night out (DJ/party/table + bottles).
Plus, even though having mastered these two skills give me a natural affinity for promoting, I still find that it has me learning new sides to both social skills and sales and I can continue to level up in both aspects.
It’s Extremely Stimulating and Fun For Me
My brain wiring is very unique and I always have a tough time getting people to understand it. I get massive, extreme neurotransmitter spikes from:
1. new people
2. new experiences
3. navigating stress and chaos
I’ve done sales conferences before where I’ve talked to 100 prospects over the course of an 8-hour day and ended up with more energy at the end of the day than when I started. The only thing I can compare it to that makes people understand is like… imagine doing a small amount of cocaine, MDMA, and modafinil all at once, having it last all day, and never getting a comedown. That’s what persistent and varied social interaction feels like for me.
My ideal lifestyle is basically interacting with as many people as possible in as many different challenging, stressful environments as possible over the course of a day.
I realize this is incomprehensible to most people but… I would literally do this for free. If I ended up with zero lays, zero social circle, and zero money after all the effort invested into promoting, I’d still look back on this time in my life like: goddamn, that was a ride.
Building a Second Income Stream
Promoting offers me the opportunity to build a consistent source of income outside of my day job. Living in New York City is expensive, and though I can make it work with my current salary, promoting provides an extra buffer.
It looks like I can make $100-$200 a night starting out, which will scale to $400 a night as I’m able to bring more girls in. This does not include a 10% commission on selling tables and bottles to clients. I estimate that for the first year, I will average $200 a night and work four nights a week. An extra $40K in my pocket doesn’t sound bad for something I’d basically be doing already: talking to girls and exploring nightlife.
Exploring Status Game / Social Connector Game
For years, I have read about status game / social connector game, a la RSD Luke and Michael Sartain, from the sidelines. Though I believe in its value, I’ve never had a chance to explore it for myself.
Promoting gives me a tried-and-true blueprint to not only spin up a social circle very quickly, but operate it from a position of status. It also paves the way for taking the social circle outside the club and hosting parties and container events.
Networking in New York City
Promoting offers me the ability to quickly network with movers and shakers in a brand new city. Being a guy who can bring attractive girls to events and has intimate knowledge of the club scene is very valuable to the right people.
My hope is to not only leverage these connections for my own benefit (e.g. booking tables and making commissions for clients), but also provide value exchange for business and personal connections outside of promoting.
Changing The Game/Dissatisfaction About Existing Promoters
This is one I didn’t actually realize was a motivation until I started to learn more about promoting: for something that seems like a dream job, the quality of existing promoters in New York City is very poor. Not only are they not competent at their jobs from a business standpoint, the majority actively repel and provide bad experiences for girls they take out.
I constantly get feedback from girls that promoters:
- Make promises they can’t keep
- Treat them like walking dollar signs and don’t get to know them as genuine people
- Are disorganized and not punctual
- Have horrible Game, ranging from uncalibrated flirting to straight up sexual harassment
- Don’t have fun at the table
So far, I’ve been doing the opposite and have been getting rave reviews. I’m constantly told that I’m the most genuine, real promoter that girls have ever talked to. New girls will sometimes to party with me within five seconds of approaching them because they can instantly sense I’m a breath of fresh air.
This feedback has turned an interest in promoting into a full-blown obsession with “changing the game”. I believe that girls in New York City deserve a professional, fun, and genuine option for their promoting experiences, and I aim to provide that for their benefit, not just for mine.
Better Understanding of Women
One of the original goals of cold approach was simply to better understand women in a holistic sense, as I felt that my experiences meeting women online were too transactional.
Promoting takes it one step further, as I’m now surrounded by attractive women every night I go out. Conversing with them in a friend capacity, not necessarily as a lover, allows me to gain insight into their feelings in a way that they might be reticent to share if they thought I were trying to seduce them.
I love mastering new skills. My ideal life would be picking up a new hobby or passion every few years and dedicating every fiber of my being to becoming the best at it.
Starting last year, that was cold approach, but promoting kind of fell in my lap, and I feel like I need to see it through now. After all, cold approach is something that can be done in a number of cities, but there are only a few cities where one can be a club promoter.
It’s Ironic and Unexpected
I’ve always gotten a kick out of being an inconoclast. My personality does not fit the archetype of a typical club promoter, many of whom are uneducated, uninteresting showoffs. In contrast, I’m a genuinely altruistic liberal arts major who rides his fixed gear bike to the club. Promoting is a sharp turn from other endeavors I’ve publicly pursued in my life.
Not only do I enjoy watching my real life friends wonder what exactly is going on with me when they watch my Instagram stories, I also enjoy creating a different image as a promoter. Because “you attract who you are”, I feel that many douchey club promoters end up with vapid club girls at their tables.
This is not my intention. I want to provide an option for more mature, professional, educated, and classy girls to enjoy nightlife without having to deal with an idiot promoter. So far, there don’t seem to be many such promoters, so I look forward to filling that niche.
There’s a reason why this is listed last: it’s simply not a priority. Right now, everything above is the focus, and getting laid is a great bonus. That being said, there are a few reasons why promoting might be beneficial for my sex life more than cold approach:
- I like value girls much more than comfort girls. Not only is the club the perfect place to find them, having promoter status finally gives me the value I need to close more of them, whereas I’ve struggled to create enough value “just being myself” in the past.
- After hitting 100 lays, I’d really like to continue upping my quality. The hope is that promoting will give me both access and status with hotter girls.
- I really hate to list this, but… promoting theoretically makes getting laid much easier than cold approach. This isn’t technically a plus for me, because I value the actual process of seduction quite a bit, but it’s worth mentioning that should I ever want sex on a platter (I mean, who doesn’t?), promoting would be a way to get there.