The Greatest Compliment

Looking back through my old posts, I’ve noticed a trend of negativity. The main reason for this is that I have little time in my day to actively blog, and when I do, it’s usually to let off steam about the many frustrations of Game in San Francisco.

However, outside of how it may appear here, my life is actually incredible, and my feeling about Game at the moment is amazing as well. I feel like I’m finally starting to put all the pieces of the attraction puzzle together.

I had one of the best daygame experiences of my life this weekend. I got on BART and sat next to a stunning older Asian woman (her real age was probably late 30s, but like many Asian women of her prototype, she looked like she was in her late 20s). Everything about her radiated style and sex appeal, which is a rarity, because attractive women don’t tend to ride BART due to the unchecked delinquency and homeless population that have become more common over the past several years.

Without hesitation, I opened her indirectly. Everything about the interaction was on point. I teased her, we vibed about our careers (it turned out we were both entrepreneurs), touched her playfully, and made her laugh. After probing logistics and discovering we were getting out at the same station, I asked for her number. She politely declined, saying she was dating someone. I laughed and went with my standard reaction: “Well, they do say two is better than one, it is San Francisco after all…” which made her crack up.

I turned around and a 50-year-old man and his friend were staring at me, wide-eyed. They had gotten off on the same stop as us and were standing on the BART platform.

“I want to congratulate you. That, my friend, was a masterful performance.” He said. I thanked him and responded that it was just part of my everyday. He pressed: “No, that was incredible. You sat down next to an incredibly beautiful woman, you were confident, and you made it happen. That is extremely inspiring.” I laughed and told him he should do the same thing as me, but he held up his left hand, revealing he had been married for 30 years.

I will never forget the reaction on that man’s face. After two years in the Game, everything I did that night flowed naturally, but to the him, I was a hero.

I looked the woman up when I got home. She runs a 100-person company and is famous enough to have a Wikipedia article. Other men would have been scared to approach, but I treated her like my kid sister. Made me feel damn good.

Viva Game.

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How to Instagram close – the Pancake way

You’ve done the work, built a high-value Instagram, and used automation to get thousands of followers (blog post on this coming soon), but how do you use it to close?

I see guys doing this wrong all the time. They’ll treat it like a number close and ask the girl for her Instagram. Wrong. This immediately puts you in the follower frame, and worse, unlike texting, if a girl doesn’t follow you on Instagram, your message will go in her “Message Requests” folder and she’ll probably never see it.

Voila, enter:

The Pancake Mouse method for Instagram closes:

1. Establish that Instagram is going to be the method of closing. “Do you have Instagram? Let’s follow each other and we can <do X date idea that you seeded>” She’ll reply in the affirmative.

2. Get her phone. Say you’re going to find your profile on it. Open Instagram, find yourself, and hit the follow button.

3. Then, send yourself a message from her. “I’m going to send a message from you so I have your insta.” Start writing a message and joke with her: “Hmm, what would you say if you were to message me? I’m guessing it would be some girly shit like ‘Heyyyy cutie, it’s <girl’s name>'”. At the same time, you’re writing this exact message and sending it to yourself, and she’s probably laughing and/or qualifying herself that she never uses that many Ys in a “hey”.

4. When you hand your phone back to her, give her some clickbait (credit: RSD Max) so that she checks out your profile right away and cements it in your mind. I usually say something like “You have to promise not to stalk me too much, OK?” or “You have to promise not to freak out when you see my profile, OK?” This immediately gets her curious about your profile, and often she’ll start stalking your photos right there. If this is a 2-set or mixed set, you can start bantering with the other people in her group while she sits there, entranced by your glistening, Adonis-like figure, your travel photos, your dog, or whatever the hell else you have on your profile. I did this on New Year’s and had two sisters scrolling through my ab photos with me watching and liking all of them.

5. A few hours after the interaction, or the next day (if nightgame), reply to her (your) message to yourself, and pitch the date as you would over text. I usually continue the banter from the night before by saying, “Wow, someone’s extremely complimentary” or teasing her about the amount of Ys she used in the “heyyyyy”.

 

Flaking in the Bay Area is out of control

In the past two weeks, I have had plans with seven different women. Only one of those women did not flake. This, gentlemen, is the story of the San Francisco Bay Area.

First, let’s define what a flake is. I’ve heard different vocabulary for many different types of flaking, and I’d like to propose a standard set of terms. So, in order of severity:

Being ghosted is when a girl stops responding to your messages at any point before a firm date/time/location is set for a date.

Being flaked on is when a girl cancels firm plans with an excuse.

Being stood up is when a girl confirms firm plans, then goes radio silent and does not show up for a date.

Looking at it on this scale, it gets even worse: three of the seven girls girls flaked and three stood me up.

Imagine getting a phone number and knowing there’s a 5% chance you’ll ever see the girl. Imagine scheduling a date and knowing there’s a 15% chance it will ever happen. Imagine questioning everything you know about your own attractiveness and self-worth because you set aside your time for a girl and she did not respect you enough to even inform you that she wasn’t going to show up.

That is life in the pit of Hell. This is life in San Francisco.

I have had bad streaks before, like last October, when 85% of my numbers ghosted/flaked, but this is much worse. Much worse because after that time, I analyzed my texting, I switched things up, I got less wordy and more direct. I started pitching dates directly on Tinder instead of bantering back and forth.

Yet, when you encounter cases like this, it makes you think all the work was for naught.

I’ll humbly post texts from the above cases for self-analysis.

1. 21 year old Tinder match. After some innocent flirty banter over Tinder and text, she level-jumped sexually. Typically, I would give her plausible deniability and flip it on her by accusing her of “corrupting” me or something similar, but with the encouragement of the Playing with Fire Facebook group, I decided to amp up the sexuality. She stood me up and unmatched me on Tinder.

2. 24 year old Tinder match. Pitched wine and whiskey at a bar near me. She flaked on confirming the time, likely not interested in how far it was away from her.

3. 35 year old Tinder match with “no hookups” in her profile. Decided to 2-date her Blackdragon style. At the end of date one, I could tell she wanted it, so we ended the date with a really passionate kiss near her car. I also seeded the second date in person with her before she left. She flaked when I confirmed time.

4. 23 year old Bumble match. This girl has actually matched me three times on different apps. Pitched dinner at mine, she agreed, she then didn’t respond when confirming exact time, then respawned in the afternoon with a flake.

5. 18 year old Tinder match. Sexual conversation, pitched vodka at mine. Worked out logistics, she confirmed the night before, then stood me up.

6. 20 year old, DMed her on Instagram, originally pitched dinner at mine. When the day came she was non-compliant and wanted me to meet her near her work in downtown SF. I played hardball but she didn’t give in. Met her downtown and hung out for 25 minutes, once I got compliance to physical touch (we were sitting on a couch with her head on my chest), I invited her back to mine. She gave an excuse about it being far away and said “next time”. I ended the date pretty abruptly after that.

The next day, I hit her up again and surprisingly she wanted to meet up that night. Again, pitched dinner at mine, she agreed, told her to let me know when she was boarding the train, then radio silence, standing me up.

So there you have it. The most amazing thing about these cases is that two of them actually involved girls I had seen at least once and had some level of investment with.

Not sure how much longer I can take this behavior.

Text Game: Non-reactive and non-needy replies increase attraction

Screenshot_20180126-223453

It is amazing how long it took me to figure out that staying non-reactive and non-needy has the potential to increase (or at least not decrease) attraction via text.

This was a girl I matched on Tinder back in October. She showed lukewarm attraction the whole time, flaking on me twice and wanting me to meet her halfway for a date. Tonight, we matched again (I reset my account every month or so in order to have a second chance with girls).

A year ago, I would have offered up an alternate day after receiving a tenuous reply like the one she offered after I said when I was free. Something like “or we could also do Wednesday if that works better”.

This time, I stuck to my guns and she caved immediately.

Is this all confirmation bias? Maybe she would have changed her mind anyway? No way to know. But this is a part of my text game I’ve been refining over the last few months and the results are too promising to ignore. Now, every time I send a message, I think:

What would a guy with so many options he couldn’t care less text? What would a guy with so many irons in the fire he wouldn’t care if this girl flaked text?

WWCT. What Would Chad Text?

 

How My Game Will — or Won’t — Evolve in 2018

Almost nothing in my lifestyle puts me in contact with hot women:

I work with all men.

I go to a rundown, sweaty, dirty gym that is 80% men, where the few girls that use the weight room don’t take their headphones out.

I live in the literal worst city in the US for attractive women (oh, and it’s also majority male). The neighborhood I live in is the worst part of town where any girl over a 5 doesn’t set foot.

My hobbies are majority male-dominated — the only women that are in my social circles are either lesbians or social justice warrior, intellectual-types (great for friends, but no sexual attraction there).

I rarely go to bars, I don’t spend money on clubs — hell, I don’t even drink.

And I fucking love it.

Most guys in the community find how I live absolutely insane, but living this ascetic existence is how I’ve most enjoyed life. My utter lack of contact with women was the reason I was convinced I would be a virgin forever, until I stumbled upon RooshV’s blog back in 2010, adding it to my RSS feed and thinking “I know I’ll be able to put this into practice someday…”

That’s why, when I downloaded Bumble while hanging out with two friends back in 2016, online game instantly appealed to me. Suddenly, I was getting direct feedback that girls were actually willing to fuck me based on nothing more than four low-quality photos and a dumb 100-word bio.

What’s better, all I had to do to get their pants off was spend an hour with them showing I wasn’t a low-value moron, and then I could fuck them, they’d leave, and I’d never have to hang out with them again.

2016 was about learning game without changing my lifestyle. I continued my busy hobbies and schedule, only inviting girls over on nights where I was bored and didn’t have anything else to do.

In 2017, I wanted more. I wasn’t getting the quality I wanted. I was tired of banging chubbies and average girls, knowing that my value was far higher than theirs, while higher-quality girls were flaking on me.

So I upped my game. I made an Instagram and started taking contrived photos and building my follower base to display status. I bought new clothes. I took girls out on dates. They sucked. I recorded them, sent them to other guys for feedback, and improved them. I DHVed about being an entrepreneur, a traveler, a citizen of the world. I experimented with daygame and nightgame.

It worked. Over the last few weeks, I’ve been so busy with girls I haven’t had time to think about much else.

Yet I’m still not where I want to be. I want higher quality. I want stunners. “Models”. Sorority girls. Instagram thots. I want to keep girls around, I want validation, I want nudes, I want threesomes, I want more texts saying “I wish you were here so I could take your dick.”

Here’s the issue:

I will reach a point in 2018 where I cannot get to where I want to be without changing my lifestyle.

I entered the game with a lifelong frame that girls were the furthest thing from a priority in my life. I’ve never pined after a girl, never had a crush, never passed notes or sent love letters, never had a monogamous relationship, never put a girl first, never did any of the Beta shit that so many guys that swallow the Pill apparently do.

Rather than chase women, I’ve spent the last ten years building an immense amount of value. Ten years of dedication to the iron. Business. Money. Confidence. Travel. Zero inhibition.

I rarely got laid when I was younger because I hid all of this from the world. I’m humble. I’m not a self-promoter. I stay quiet, preferring to lurk in the shadows and help other guys, while taking none of the credit. As soon as I learned Game, I learned to unhide this value, and then came the women. I was surprised to learn that everything I had been doing to build myself as a man was actually somewhat attractive to women as well — I just had to put myself in a position to show it to them. Of course, once any normal girl figures out I’m a maniac Sigma with a weird social circle and weird hobbies after sleeping me with a couple times, it’s tough to keep her around, but I keep enough in the rotation that it often doesn’t matter.

My struggle, now, will be that I will develop my Game to such a level where it will be impossible to improve the quality of the women I’m sleeping with without becoming someone I’m not.

The path to hotties has become quite clear to me over the past few months. It is not paved with shirtless Tinder photos and inviting girls over for wine, nor with Yad stops on San Francisco sidewalks. No, the path to hotties is paved with social circle and status.

If I were to drop everything and focus my life on only fucking hot girls, where’s what I would do:

Drop my current hobbies, change my clothing style and backstory, and moving to a completely new city, change my friends group, rent a million+ dollar apartment, organize parties, throw money around, promote in clubs, and become the king of my new social circle. This would actually be pretty easy to do, and I could accomplish it in under two years. I would slay with the best of them, with girls like I described in my previous post: I’m not attracting the types of girls I want to attract.

But I’m a Sigma, so this would be treason. I live a unique and ascetic life because it brings me joy, and if changing this would mean converting into some vapid Chad Thundercock whose only interests include cracking open a cold one with the boys, boat shoes, and American football…. all for what? Top-shelf vagina?

Having to hide who I actually am around the type of people that this lifestyle would attract would be devastating. I would be intellectually stunted.

It doesn’t seem worth it. So for 2018, I’ll keep my lifestyle intact and continue to improve my game. When I reach a point where an upward trajectory seems impossible, only then will I consider a change.

JMULV has the best advice in Game right now

Over the past few weeks, a mad research rampage into nightgame led me to the YouTube channel of a guy named John Mulvehill, aka JMULV. He’s an ex-RSD instructor that saw through the bullshit enough to not continue with them and started his own company called Efficient Pickup. That company went down when some of the guys associated with it were charged with rape and he was (allegedly falsely) accused of kidnapping, coercion, and lewdness. Seems like he’s been laying low for a while and has since branched out on his own.

Now, I can see JMULV rubbing people the wrong way:

  • He talks about his notch count ad nauseum, claiming to have 766 lifetime notches.
  • He’s prone to braggadocio.
  • He goes off on wild tangents in his videos and has a hard time expressing his points. Videos that should take 20 minutes take an hour and 20 minutes.
  • He comes off as a complete and utter sociopath.

I shook my head the first time I watched some of his videos. But the more I watched, the more I was impressed — you don’t get to 750+ notches without learning a thing or two along the way. And guess what? Dark triad guys tend to get laid a lot.

JMULV’s game can probably be best described as the best parts of RSD/Mystery Method, Blackdragon and Good Looking Loser mixed with dark triad and red pill concepts.

His magnum opus is a 5 hour, 14 minute (yes, I know) breakdown of his game:

I’ve watched the entire thing (on 1.5x speed, naturally), over the course of the last week, and I’m pretty floored.

I’ve never found a guy who sells products that doesn’t have some sort of bullshit in their philosophy. Even guys I learned the most from, like Blackdragon, Krauser, and Good Looking Loser have major flaws, in my opinion, with their systems.

JMULV is the only guy I’ve ever seen put a practical system together that combines multiple lead sources (night game, online game, and day game) that results in getting laid while minimizing time spent on women.

The advantage of JMULV’s underproduced, rambling videos is that you see him at his rawest. And better yet, it’s all actionable, practical advice. No fluff, no philosophy, no abstraction, like other gurus are fond of. I know a lot of guys aren’t going to have the patience to watch the entire video, so here’s the flow chart, and I’ll summarize below:

l4nxmu7

Nightgame

Nightgame is definitely his forté and where I learned the most. This is his typical nightgame routine:

jmulv-flowchart

  • He believes in very quick screening and closes. Here’s a good thread on the RooshV forum with a summary of his night game philosophy and here is a two-hour long webinar on it if you have more patience.
  • He opens with strong eye contact, vocal tonality, and body language, and immediately starts kino.
  • Assuming the girl reciprocates, he makes small talk and probes her logistics.
  • He plants the idea of her going home with him right away.
  • If she’s not interested at all, he takes the number and works it into his normal leads funnel.
  • If she is, he handles any objections, bounces her outside or to a second location, and then gives a false time constraint and bounces back to his place (insinuating that no sex will happen)
  • He’s realistic that it will be tough for most guys to pull consistently on a night out, and so will try to collect a bunch of numbers for his funnel. This is something I’ve never heard anyone else mention, but is completely true.

Online Game

  • He uses Tinder and Bumble with heavily-photoshopped, professionally-taken profile photos with good lighting
  • He uses several DHV photos that he takes in front of a green screen and photoshops in the background: him DJing at a huge event, skiing, standing in London
  • He’s tall, so he has one selfie emphasizing his height, taken in a suit.
  • His messaging is persistent and he goes for the number within 6-10 messages.

Daygame

  • His daygame is definitely the weakest part of his game. He doesn’t do it that much, only has 20 daygame lays total.
  • His openers are not great “Can I meet you real fast?” and he seems a bit nervous, but his tonality is good and he’s low energy and not excitable.
  • He DHVs like a madman with stuff like “I’m a DJ” and “I used to live in London” and similar.
  • He goes for the number really fast. 1-2 minutes. Doesn’t do much comfort-building. Probably gets a lot of weak leads.
  • He talks about “hired gun” game, basically gaming promoters or hostesses by insinuating that he organizes events and then getting their number, then running standard game from there.

Dates

  • He seeds the date with every interaction he has with a girl, i.e. during daygame and night game he gives them a preview of what they’re going to be doing on the date
  • Invites 90% of the girls he meets directly over to his house to “split a bottle of wine”.
  • The girls that don’t want to meet at his house, he takes them out, and then bounces them back to his house to “drink champagne” and gives a false time constraint

Retention/Building a Harem

  • Fucks women well the first time they have sex, and thereafter
  • Remains non-needy and doesn’t pedestalize women once they’re in rotation, i.e. doesn’t text her back right away, doesn’t comment when she sends nudes
  • Never commits to monogamy with any of the women in his rotation

There’s obviously a lot more, but that’s a summary of his thoughts on the key points. For more, I recommend watching his YouTube channel.

 

My 2017 Statistics and Analysis

My second year (and first full year) in the game was an auspicious one, with plenty of experimentation and travel.

Notches

28 (2016: 20)

12 in San Francisco
8 in a third-tier US city where I was living over the summer
3 during a trip to Guatemala City
3 during a trip to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico (including one threesome)
1 during a trip to Argentina
1 during a work trip in Seattle

Notch Sources

All were from online.

24 Tinder
2 Bumble
2 Instagram

I also did 55 daygame approaches, got 9 numbers, had 2 dates, but zero bangs. Clearly, my daygame needs work, but for reasons I’ll outline in a future post, I don’t think daygame works well in San Francisco.

Notch Quality

Disclaimer: I have one of the “harshest” and most accurate rating systems that I know of in the community (nearly ever guy overrates). I’m still working on my full 1-10 rating scale with pictorial evidence, which can serve as reference to the community and hopefully stop the number inflation trend.

One 4.5, five 5s, three 5.5s, seven 6s, four 6.5s, five 7s, and one 7.5.

Average notch rating: 6.03 (2016: 5.725)

I was shooting for better quality this year, and did marginally well, but still wasn’t able to fully get there, mostly because lack of abundance made me reach below my level on occasion.

Unsurprisingly, my average rating in San Francisco was 5.71, meaning that everywhere else I did much better than here. Speaks to the incredible difficulty and low quality of women available in this city.

Conversion Rate (Notches/First Dates)

An important metric that tracks how good my “date game”, as well as my screening, is. Note that this means new notches per each girl I saw, not multiple dates with the same girl.

This was:

53%, or 8/15 while traveling. Surprised this isn’t higher as I was usually pretty clear that I was just visiting, but I’m continually impressed at the number of girls that will waste time going out on dates with a guy passing through and not give it up.

42%, or 8/19 in the third-tier US City.

39%, or 12/31 in San Francisco (including a terrible streak from October to December where I took 11 girls out and closed 1 of them).

Overall, I believe these numbers to be pretty low. This signals that there is still a problem with what I’m doing on dates. This is unfortunate, because I feel that my dates are the thing I’ve worked to improve most this year. More work is needed.

Bucket List Notches

Virgin and minus 10 year age difference

Met an 18-year-old on Tinder, and took a phone call and some Snapchat comfort before she drove an hour out to meet me. On the first date, I took her out for coffee and found out that she was not only a virgin, but hadn’t kissed a guy before. I brought her back to my place and taught her how to kiss and how to give head — it was adorable. For our second meet, I took her virginity, making her orgasm twice through penetration. It was incredible and left me wanting more. She was a sweet, introverted girl and we got along well.

Shorter than 5 feet

Had some of the most passionate sex of my life with a 4’11” Guatemalan girl. Latinas are something special.

Girl with “no hookups” in her online dating profile

Smashed an introverted Thai au pair off of Tinder. She wasn’t a looker (5), but I wanted the bucket list and it ended a five week dry streak. I actually ended up texting her to see if she wanted to come over again, and she turned me down for “not wanting a relationship”. Clever girl.

Threesome and girl in non-open relationship

My spontaneous threesome in Cabo featured a girl who was cheating on her boyfriend. I follow her on Instagram and she continues to post photos of him with captions expressing her undying love. I don’t understand monogamy.

Three girls in three days

At the end of April, I had a pretty incredible streak of three girls in three days. One was a two-date (I had taken her out for coffee the day before, then we grabbed dinner the following night), another I took out to a bar and successfully took home the next night, and the final night I cooked dinner for yet another at my house (after meeting her for five minutes in public upon her request).

Two girls in a day

I followed that streak with a wonderful September 1, where I fucked a 7 after inviting her over for lunch and a 7.5 after inviting her over for dinner. Both were second dates (in the summer I was generally running Blackdragon’s two-date model).

More Fun Stories

Had a date with a 9 and a 9.5. The 9 was a Venezuelan full-time model in Guatemala (pictorial equivalent) and the 9.5 was the legitimate hottest girl in third-tier US city I was living in (pictorial equivalent).  Unfortunately, I didn’t so much as kiss these girls. Either my game just isn’t to that level yet or they had a different image of me online than what I presented in person. Either way, it was a nice preview of what is to come once I improve my game.

Gave a 22-year-old Asian virgin with social anxiety her first kiss. She was literally trembling on the date. I ran good game with tons of comfort, calmed her down, and took her for a walk around the block. “Have you ever kissed a guy?” “No.” “Do you want to?” “Yes.” She had no idea how to kiss and wasn’t coachable. I didn’t contact her again.

Fucked a college student who drove an hour to come see me using fake threesome game on Tinder. Blog post to come… maybe. Not sure if I want to reveal this secret yet.

Fucked a Chinese girl in Seattle using headless+shirtless photo/explicit bio game. She never saw a photo of my face before meeting. Blog post about this type of game to come.

Fucked two girls after inviting them over directly after daytime tea dates. Shattered my perception that you have to take girls out for drinks at night to bang them.

Analysis of My Game in 2017

In 2016, I ran almost straight “DTF pitch” game, where I explicitly invited girls from Tinder over to my house for dinner, then fucked them. While this was fun and minimized my time investment, my game hardly improved, and I knew if I was shooting for quality I had to start taking girls out on dates. I discovered Blackdragon‘s two-date model: a one-hour drinks/coffee date for D1, and an invitation over for dinner for D2. While I still lost a ton of girls between D1 and D2, I believe this was a reason for my slight bump in quality this year.

I experimented with Instagram game. I fucked two girls from cold DMs on Instagram and had dates with many more. My initial impression is that it hasn’t been worth the time I spent on it and the focus on it over the past year from various guys is exaggerated.

I massively improved my date game. At the beginning of the year, I was running too much clown game on dates — talking about myself too much, teasing, laughing, joking. Too high energy. I started recording dates and sending them to a chat group I was in. After careful analysis and feedback I changed my tonality and vibe to be quieter, more questioning, more alpha, but continuing the teasing.

I improved my text game, with the help of feedback from Yohami and others. By the end of the year, I’ve dialed my text game back from rapport-seeking texts and ping texts (a lá Krauser and Tom Torero) to game that I believe works better on American girls: I write less, invest less, and don’t seek rapport.

With the help of Magnum and Blackdragon, I improved my date pitch transition from online, cutting down on my flake percentage. It was 85% in October, and while I haven’t kept good track, I’d wager it’s down to 60%. Instead of getting the girls number, chatting for a while, and then pitching a date, I lock down the date, time, and location of the date immediately on the app, then get her number in case something comes up.

As I traveled to in different cities, I became even more acutely aware that San Francisco is the worst city in the United States for girls, and that living here is truly like being run through a crucible. (I feel like a broken record here, but more on this in a future post).

Finally, during the last three months of the year, I hit a rough patch as I moved back to San Francisco and girls weren’t as easy as where I was living over the summer. I dedicated myself to studying game. I started this blog, sought out new mentors and wings, read and posted on more forums, and got inspiration from RSD, Blackdragon JMULV, and Playing with Fire. December specifically was a breakthrough month, where I really feel like my understanding of women has broken through to a next level, which hopefully translates into a killer 2018.

My next blog post will cover some of how I see my game evolving in 2018.