I’m Not The Player I Thought I Was

I’ve had a pretty serious revelation over the past week, fueled by recent feedback from my wings in New York City, who for the first time were able to both allow me to see how advanced guys come off in set, as well as give me raw, honest feedback on my vibe.

  • I’ve never actually learned how to seduce a woman.
  • I’m not actually emitting behaviors that are attractive to women (for example: my in-person interactions generally look like I’m chasing them, rather than them chasing me).
  • I’ve never learned how to evoke emotions in a woman.
  • In line with the path of least resistance, I’ve used Tinder as a crutch to set up an efficient funnel of girls straight to my house where sex is already guaranteed, to avoid actually having to learn how to do the hard work.


I want to be able to seduce a woman in any scenario, like some of my other natural friends do. I want to fuck my Uber drivers, friends of friends, girls at the airport. I marvel at how other guys build comfort, evoke emotion, and get women to invest in them.

On the other hand, my game looks like this: I’m hot, you’re hot. Let’s rut urgently, like jackals). The times where the girls aren’t already into me, like cold approach, I fall back on showing a facade of behaviors I think are attractive, and they see right through it.

I want to be total and complete player, not just one that relies on his looks and persistence to close.

I am giving myself one year, starting November 1, to do this.

  • I will be writing daily field reports, analyzing my weaknesses, and hoping to improve with each passing day.
  • I will be favoring cold approach and the uncertainty of in-person seduction over the familiar comfort of Tinder.
  • I will be moving to New York City in April to accelerate my learning.

On November 1, 2022, I will check in and re-evaluate my progress.

Let’s fucking go.

4 thoughts on “I’m Not The Player I Thought I Was

  1. Chris

    I had the revelation also a few years back….I thought because I was pulling consistently I had good game. I then went to Vegas and bombed it. Turned out my pulling was due to being in top 1% shape and on steroids. I was able to overcompensate my stoicism and get hot girls with my body. It sucked when I stopped the steroids and deflated I just wasn’t as good. I also had to learn that I’d never have advance game, still above average looking and know how to escalate but due to how I grew up I’ll never develop charisma needed to be a top seducer.


    1. Interesting. I won’t claim to be top 1% but I’m definitely top 5%. Somewhere close to #2 here: https://foxhoundstudio.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/sex-icon-line-scott-herman-bob-adrien-brody-zyzz-ideal-body-small.jpg

      I’m above average looking and dress well. So while I’m not a Chad, I have zero problems getting blown out by even 9+ type girls just because of my looks.

      I have heard that being 1% in something gets you exponentially better results, though. I saw this secondhand from Sonny Arvado (https://youtu.be/daj2vDe5iXs), one of my mentors.

      Where are you at in Game right now? Why do you think you don’t have the capability to become advanced?


      1. Chris

        I’m currently in Eastern Europe and do alright here, like one chick a month from online and get more dates from night game and what not here than in the states. I point to why I’m not able to be a top seducer as the fact I grew up with a mental illness, body dysmorphic disorder and when you have that you repressed your expressions and emotions, I over came a lot of it with a psychologist in my early 20s but I’ll never be even a normal charismatic guy let alone one who is a top seducer. If you repress your emotions through out childhood and early adulthood you can’t just change as an adult, you can to an extent and I have but only so much..
        I also abused opiates heavily in my late teens and early 20s which did a number on my dopamine receptors in my opinion. I was able to overcome this in my mid to late 20s in the states by being in really good shape. Chicks in the states really value spiking their emotions, if you are not an emotional guy like me due to what I said above, you have to over compensate it somehow, mine was through looks. I now have some injuries and don’t like to use steroids so I’ll never be in the shape I was in my mid 20s (6″3, 190 lbs, deadlifting 500). I have decent technical game tbh as I’ve been with nearly 100 women but I’ll never be a top seducer and it’s why I bombed in Vegas, I had to low energy levels and a stoic personality for Vegas. It’s why I think I’ll have better luck in Eastern Europe….they don’t value emotional spiking as much and are more logical.


  2. Cocky & Funny + Persistence is “good looking guy” game, and I’m not going to knock it, it definitely works, but its a lot of effort and more of a personal branding exercise than anything persuasion related.

    Since you’re the logical type, try gaming for 3 months without any C&F or persistence, just using compliance ladders (baby stepping moves), small talk and qualification. See how far you can get in a set without attraction. You’ll probably have to endure a dry spell but your game will improve.


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